Friday, August 27, 2010

A Fifth of Crazy

Hey folks, Mr. Phidias (formerly Space Trucker) here.

A few days ago I posted a few tweets on Twitter about what 20% of the U.S. population believe after hearing that one in five Americans believe that President Obama is a Muslim.
While I was basically using factual information, I was mainly just snarking on social conservatives, religious wackos, and conspiracy nut jobs.
Thinking on this for a few days, I thought that I would expand on it some. Not being hampered to 140 character limitation of Twitter, perhaps I can improve on the subject.
It does vex me as why a fifth of the American population could be so batshit insane. Is it really insanity? I haven't really researched to see if it is geographical within the U.S. boarders. Does anyone know?
I bet here in the South it is a lot higher than twenty percent. And the reason why doesn't take Adrian Monk to solve that fucking mystery.
Thinking about this made me start remembering other twenty percent mysteries.
I remember reading somewhere years ago that Nixon had a 20% approval rating on the day he resigned in disgrace.
Doing a quick check on the Internets I found out that many other stupid ass things were believed by roughly 20% of Americans. Sometimes it was a little higher, sometimes a little less, but well within the 1 in 5 estimate ratio I am using here.
Here are a few other brain numbing factiods about our 20% brethren.
20% of U.S. citizens believe that the moon landings were a hoax. They believe this no matter how much you beat their heads in with mountains of evidence and logic. I work at NASA and there was a guy who used to work with me that believed it. I even busted him in front of one of the last living members of Von Braun's rocket team. To his credit he didn't back down, even with the old German getting red faced and pissed off.
Just imagine the size and scope of creating an Apollo moon mission hoax. Thousands of people would have to be in on it. The Russians would be screaming that it was a fraud as we were in a race with them to be the first there. Doesn't matter, these dumbasses will believe it no matter what you say or prove.
20% of U.S. citizens believe in magic and witches and shit. What can you say about that? Sheesh.
20% of U.S. citizens believe professional wrestling is real. These people can be dangerous.
20% of U.S. citizens believe that it is a proven scientific fact that woman was created from man by God removing a rib from his side and to this day, men have one fewer ribs than women. No shit.
20% of U.S. citizens think that George W. Bush was a great president. If you tell them any different, they are liable to fling their feces at you.
Getting back to President Obama, 20% of U.S. citizens still believe that he isn't an American citizen and that his birth certificate has yet to be seen. This includes prominent politicians like Senator Richard Shelby, (R- Nitwit) who said to a crowd of idiots that he doesn't know if he's a citizen or not, because he personally hasn't seen the birth certificate.
20% of U.S. citizens believe that Tokyo is the capitol of China.
Hey. It gets worse, people.
20% of U.S. citizens think that humans and dinosaurs coexisted together a few thousand years ago.
20% of U.S. citizens think that the sun rotates around the Earth.
20% of U.S. citizens believe that Mt. Rushmore is a natural phenomenon.
20% of U.S. citizens believe that Elvis is still alive. A similar percentage can be said the same of Jim Morrison and Tupac Shakur (sp?) when polling those that are familiar with their music.
20% of U.S. citizens think that Hitler didn't commit suicide and managed to escape the Allies along with Mengele and other Nazis.
20% of U.S. citizens believe there are space aliens living among us. Hear that Lou Dobbs?
20% of U.S. citizens can not locate the United States on a fucking globe.
20% of U.S. citizens can not tell you which country the United States declared independence from.
20% of U.S. citizens have no idea how many branches of the U.S. government their are, let alone name them.
20% of U.S. citizens do not know who won the Civil War. I bet most of those are Yankees because here in the South, they ain't never gonna forget.
20% of U.S. citizens think that Jesus wrote the Bible. I guess he must have dictated while he was nailed to the cross.
20% of U.S. citizens believe that Jesus spoke English. In Shakespearean style prose no less.
20% of U.S. citizens don't think that bacon, pork chops, baby back ribs, sausage, and ham all come from the same animal.
20% of U.S. citizens believe that it was Saddam Hussein that attacked us on 9-11.
It would be great if they were all the same 20%. Unfortunately it is not.
My theory is that one in five people are born stupid and borderline insane. Depending on their environment they are in determines what kind of batshit nonsense they believe.
Next time you are with four other people. Try to determine which one is the nut job, if they all seem normal, guess what?
Man, just imagine if it really was all the same 20 percent? That mailing list would be gold! Priceless! You can sell anything to those ass clowns.
Later people.
Mr. Phidias-
Part of the 20 percent who think blogging will make a difference in the world.

Tuesday, August 24, 2010

Jedi Mind Trick

From time to time, I receive forwarded email from a right leaning friend who finds Glen Beck amusing (gag, sputter) and thinks that liberal bashing is a fun afternoon activity. Mostly, I recognize those mail and simply hit delete without opening it up. However, from time to time, I open the email to see what kind of shit is being floated around in the webosphere to poison weak minded fools and induce them to spread the joy by forwarding the swill around.

Case in point. I got an email today that read, paraphrased, in part:

Here is something everyone will be able to say thank you to Obama and his greedy Cronies for. So think about this on Nov. 2, 2010 when you go to vote.

Under the new health care bill - did you know that all real estate transactions are now subject to a 3.8% Sales Tax? The bulk of these new taxes don't kick in until 2013 (presumably after Obamas re-election). You can thank Nancy, Harry and Barack and your local Democrat Congressman for this one. If you sell your $400,000 home, there will be a $15,200 tax. This bill is set to screw the retiring generation who often downsize their homes.

Is this Hope & Change great or what?

Here's more good news.

2011 W-2 Tax Forms and Obamacare

If this doesn't get to you, then check your pulse. You may be a

Starting in 2011-next year-the W-2 tax form sent by your employer will be
increased to show the value of whatever health insurance you are provided. and on and on ad nauseam.

Folks, these email are made up by people who have nothing substantive to say, so they make stuff up that appeals to emotional triggers already set to fire over the election of a black man as President. They are not truthful and are circulated like a Jedi mind trick to appeal to the non-thinkers out there (the weak minded fools) to influence how they think and vote. So, before you hit forward, check the email out. It doesn't take long and will keep you from looking like a weak minded fool.

Monday, August 16, 2010

Reinvention of the Boogie Man (aka Raw Hide and Bloody Bones)

While traveling through Tennessee this past weekend, I had the occasion to witness the reinvention of a legend. I make the trek to Sparta, Tennessee every 2nd Saturday in August to Decoration Day, a colloquial term only recognizable by true old style Southerners, and I've been doing this most of my life. One of the things I can remember from these trips when I was a child was that my cousins and I formed a loud, rowdy horde at my grandmother's house and did all the unsafe and unreasonable things that could be expected when you had several related children together on a summer afternoon without TV and air conditioning. That was a different time. My Grandmother's method of getting us in line involved the vague threat that "Ole Raw Hide and Bloody Bones is going to come get all of you if you don't behave" I spent many nights imagining just what such a creature would look like.

While I never saw an illustration of Grandma's boogie man, lately I have been hearing talk and witnessing fear of boogie men. On the side of one of the roads in Tennessee, I saw a large painted sign in the front of a home. It had in large red letters outlined in black the word "OBAMA" and then below "hates the Bible!" There was more, but I can't share that with you because one, I'm blind and couldn't see it and two, the kind of fanatic that would write something like this scares the shit out of me, and I didn't stop to take a closer look. This is not the only example I've seen lately. The Boogie Man is a ~gasp~ liberal, a ~gasp~ socialist, a ~gasp~ muslim. The Boogie Man has invaded the White House, the Capital Building, Ground Zero, all the States that border Mexico and is much touted amidst tears of angst as the "undoing of this country." Grandma could not have envisioned it better.

Thursday, August 5, 2010


There are so many causes I believe in strongly, it's hard to decide which ones to donate to. My limited income allows for only a few small donations a year.
One organization I always remember to give to is Shriners Hospital for children.
My reasons for that are as clear as family. In 1974 Shriners paid for the doctors, surgery and eye glasses that saved my niece's eyesight.
Now Shriners hospital is stepping up again, providing surgery, braces, and the expensive special foot wear to treat my 7 month old granddaughter's severe club feet.

I urge everyone to donate to this awesome organization. It is for the children and what cause could be better than that?

To learn more and perhaps make a donation, please check out their web sight.