Friday, May 29, 2009

Only a Republican Could

I have to admit something here. I really enjoy making fun of Republicans. I mean, I REALLY enjoy it.
Does that make me a bad person? I do have the occasional second thought whenever I point at some fucktardary and laugh hysterically. I would never laugh at a fat lady slipping on a banana peel, or a child with his head stuck in an industrial sized can of Van Camps pork and beans, so why do I find these other equally tragic events funny?
At my local watering hole, I overheard a couple of the fucktards that were bellied up to the bar opining about gay marriage.
One of the guys, who believe it or not I call a friend, actually said that he was opposed to gay marriage because the act itself will cause more diseases and healthcare was already expensive enough.
After I recoverd from the long bout of laughter, I noticed that the fellow he had been talking with had relocated away from him, obviously embarrassed at the thought of being lumped in with that fucktard reasoning.
The fellow making the statement actually thinks the act of cohabitation between two men will create germs and bacteria out of nothing. Poor guy. Should I be laughing at him? Probably not, but WTF?
Another topic at the watering hole that everyone seems to agree on, is the justification or water boarding.
To a person, with yours truly being the sole light of reason in the bleak world of fucktardary, they follow this line of thought on the subject:
Them: "Waterboarding isn't torture."
Me: "What? Of Course it is!"
Them: "No, it is just holding them down and sprinkling them with water. Anyone can handle it, it isn't torture."
Me: "Then what is the purpose of doing it? If it is harmless, why would the subject give up secrets?"
Them: Silence
Me: "I mean come on, I have heard proponents of waterboarding say that they start singing immediately. That they have extracted information from resistant terrorists because of it. If it is harmless, why did they give it up?"
Them: "There you go! You just admitted that it works!"
Me: "I said supporters of waterboarding said it works. Do you think it works?"
Them: "Yes, I think it works. We are safer because of it."
Me: "But you never answered, why would a suspect confess during waterboarding if it wasn't torture? Surely you don't think a hardened criminal would break after just a few seconds of this if it wasn't really traumatic?"
Them: "Fuck 'em. Even if it is torture, if it keeps America safe, we should use it."
Me: "But torture is illegal. Even your hero George W. Bush says so."
Them: "What ever".
Me: "Aren't you the one that was yelling 'we are a nation of laws' when Clinton was accused of lying about a blowjob? What happened? We can break laws now?"
Them: "Nancy Pelosi new about it too".
Me: "Fuck Nancy Pelosi."
Them: "Well if she knew she should be punished too."
Me: "I agree."
Them: Silence.
Me: "Well, I am glad we reached a common ground. We both seem to think that torture is a crime and people who do it should be held accountable."
Them: Silence.
Me: "Right?"
Them: "They only did it to three people."
Me: "Sigh."
Thus is the mentality of the Alabama fucktard. And these particular fucktards are college educated, work for NASA or the Army Missile Command or any of several high tech companies around the Rocket City area. Just imagine how it is when you get out of the city and into the rural areas.
Of course the word empathy has become something terrible to the fucktard mind. Turn on Fox "News" at any given time and you will hear wailing and gnashing of the teeth by whichever commentator happens to be on. Empathy, these geniuses have been known to say, is code word for liberal activism or legislating from the bench.
My question is, why would Sotomayor or Obama have wanted to send out code words?
Fuck, she already has the job by any reasonable standard. Barring a successful filibuster (come on, don't you secretly wish the Pugs were stupid enough to try it?) she will be the successor of Justice Souter.
So, why in Hell would she send out code words? Something is wrong with a code system that only your enemies pick up. I'm a liberal and I know lots of liberals and none of them have mentioned cracking the da Sotomayor Code.
Maybe Obama has hatched an evil scheme with his army of mad scientists to beam code words into Glen Becks atrophied brain and make his head explode. Fuck that would be cool.
The answer is plain and simple. Republicans are the party of no. They can no more support Obama than Rush Limbaugh can turn down a pork chop.
The GOP. The party of torture and the warriors against empathy.
Come on and join me and pointing and laughing at them.

Tuesday, May 26, 2009

The Right's Judicial Nominee Argument

I am fed up with listening to the same old tired argument the right wing always uses when opposing judicial nominees, i.e.

  • Sen. Jeff Sessions, the ranking Republican on the Senate Judiciary Committee, said senators “must determine if Ms. Sotomayor understands that the proper role of a judge is to act as a neutral umpire of the law, calling balls and strikes fairly without regard to one's own personal preferences or political views."

  • Senate Minority Leader Mitch McConnell (R-Ky.) – who voted against Sotomayor’s confirmation in 1998 — said Republicans will treat her "fairly” as they examine her record “to ensure she understands that the role of a jurist in our democracy is to apply the law even-handedly, despite their own feelings or personal or political preferences."

Well, what are the Courts if not a collection of personal preferences and political views? The constitution sets up the Courts to interpret the law as it applies to specific incidents and circumstances. By its nature, since a Court is made up of human beings and not automatons, their preferences and views are always going to be reflected in their decisions. What the right is really saying it is that we don’t agree with the preferences and views of nominees made by a Democrat and that we are afraid you will be Pro-Choice, Anti-NRA, and mess up the direction the Court was beginning to take with Dubya’s two nominees. Their argument is a glossed over generic statement that makes a good sound byte, but has no substance, which if you think about it is consistent with all their other arguments.

Sunday, May 24, 2009

The British UFO TV series is headed for the big screen

I can remember way back when this show first came on. It absolutely fucking blew me away. At the time the effects were incredible for television. If I recall correctly the effects guy also did James Bond movies and worked with John Dykstra on 2001: A Space Odyssey.
The stories had dark themes along with the twisted British sci-fi mentality. One episode had the main character, Commander Straker having to make a choice between taking his dying son to the hospital or capture an alien operative. He tried to do both and failed on both.
The theme music is what I really remember the most. I still think this show has the best opening sequence ever made. The 1969 view of the then future 1980 was awesome. Yeah, I know it looks cheesy now. But still.
It would be great if the people who are bringing this show back would take the bold step and leave the show in that universe of 1980, but of course they won't. I am sure it will be updated, rebooted, and geared towards an American audience with an all U.S. cast rather than the quirky British one. LOL, in the original, S.H.A.D.O (Supreme Headquarters Alien Defense Organization) was located underneath a film studio. Supposedly, that way they can bring in all kinds of alien and future stuff without raising suspicion. Everyone would just assume they were making another cheesy sci-fi movie.
Here is the link to the sci-fi wire article:
Also check out the opening sequence of each weeks show:

Thursday, May 21, 2009

Hannity the Pussy Part 2

Continuing with the Hannity beat down theme from below, I would just like to say that I am no way a big fan of the meat head Jesse Ventura.
However he did manage to shout down the fucktard host and call him on most of the bullshit that Hannity vomits on a regular basis.
Ventura should have called him on one of the lies that Hannity and all the fucktards like to blather nonstop about, and that is the untruth that Bill Clinton turned down the opportunity to have Osama bin Laden handed over to him by the Sudanese.
Lets forget the 911 commision report that said that was a crock of shit. Lets just use some goddamn plain old logic and common sense. Yeah yeah, I know. Those two elements are kryptonite to the fucktard mind and can never be used around Republicans. But this is just us so we can utilize it.
According to Hannity and his ilk, the Sudanese government or some element in the Sudan offered then President Bill Clinton Osama bin Laden and the president turned down the offer.
Ok, here is where some logic has to be utilized. Lets pretend that it really happened, that for some unfathomable reason Bill Clinton did not want him, that there were some legal loop holes that would cause some problems (remember that is was pre 9-11) or perhaps he was just blinded because he was focused on getting blowjobs from the chunky chick that was bringing him the mail. Doesn't really matter.
Who had bin Laden? Did they capture him and were holding him in a cell somewhere? Hannity and company never say that the Sudanese offered to hunt down and capture him, they say they tried to hand him over to Clinton.
Suppose you were these people who were holding bin Laden. You had just tried to hand over a powerful billionaire terrorist to the enemy he had sworn to God to kill.
Now what do you do with him when Clinton didn't want him? Was there no one else interested in having him? After all, he was reported to have masterminded attacks on a lot of other people too. Tony Blair didn't want him either? How about that French fucker? Him either? None of the European democracies wanted to bring this monster to justice?
Ok. So nobody wants his sorry ass, you just let him go and say sorry about that? No fear that he will retalitate for capturing him and trying to hand him over to his enemies?
What a crock of shit. The sad thing is, fucktards eat that lie up like a starving hobo on a balogna sandwich. And you can't use logic on them because once you pull that glowing green meteroite out of your lead lined pocket they flee in terror.
If we could just get some Democrats with spines to just stand up and list the mother fucking facts, the Republicans would be laughed out of town.
I guess that is just way to much to hope for.

Wednesday, May 20, 2009

My 2 cents worth on Hannity vs Ventura

i also saw the video, spacetrucker. I agree with your views on all but one point. That little white kitty with the pink bow is way too cute to be Hannity. The image below far better resembles that stinker.

Sean Hannity is a Pussy

A twitter person I am following (Gr8RDH) posted a link to a youtube video of the vile piece of shit better known as Sean Hannity interviewing former MN governor and current meat head Jesse Ventura.
If you have ever had to set through Hannitys show you know what I mean when I say calling him shit is an insult to feces all over the world.
Normally he brow beats, insults, and yells over any hostile guest (who in a moment of idiocy agrees to come on his show) in true Fox "News" fashion.
This time however he must have thought that there was the possibility of an ass kicking, because he swooned, armed touched, and eye batted anytime he said anything disagreeing with Ventura.
Ventura evidently came on the fucktards show to debate waterboarding. The torture practice Puss Boy said wasn't torture.
Hannity managed to keep the talk away from that during the whole segment, arguing about Obamas economic policies and defending The Bastard Bushs failed ones. Ventura was obviously displeased that Hannity ran out the clock before he had time to redden his ass on the subject.
Seeing a man vehemently disagreeing with another man while at the same time acting like he would suck his dick if only he would ask, is rather disconcerting. You have to see it for yourself. Hope to put a link or embed it here in an update later.
I had to compose and upload this by cell phone. please ignore the obvious typos and grammatical non sequitors.

UPDATE! I finally got to a computer. Here is the video of the pussy:

Monday, May 18, 2009

New Blogging Toy

I finally got me an iGo keyboard for my cell phone. I won it on eBay for $50.
It is pretty neat. If you can see the picture above the part sticking up in the back is where the phone sits. Since I used my phone to take the picture it is not in it.
It pairs up to my phone via bluetooth. I bought it used and it came with no manual or CD with driver software. I managed to finally figure everything out and it works like a charm.
This is the first significant use of it so I have no idea how longs the batteries last. (2 AAA)
Actually this is probably taking longer to type than thumb typing as I am not used to the keys yet.
They have a better one I would like to get someday. Like this one, it hooks up via blue tooth and is the size of a cigarette lighter.
It uses a laser to project a virtual keyboard on the table top. Then with an infrared field it can detect when you "press" a key.
Pretty fucking neat and a great conversation starter. I imagine it won't be long until some of the high end smart phones will have it built in.
The biggest draw back on cell phone blogging for me is, I have grown so fucking used to spell check. Once you are spoiled with that it is hard to get over it.
Any way, time to read some news and see if any of our Alabama officials said something retarded again. Perhaps Jeff Sessions will elaborate on some of the better qualities of the Ku Klux Klan or something.

Update: Forgot to mention that it folds up and fits into a carrying case. Not much bigger than a big cell phone itself.

Saturday, May 16, 2009

The Embarrassment Never Ends

Sweet Jesus with a telephone pole up His ass. Is it possible to go a week without our Alabama elected officials embarrassing the living shit out of us?
Is the GOP running a contest to see who is the stupidest goddamn fucktard in the party and Alabama has the undisputed winning team?
Jeff "half-a-motheerfucker" Sessions (R- Midget) defended keeping Guantanamo open because, get this, "it provides tropical breezes" for the inmates.
Sen. Jeff Sessions (R-Ala.) today defended the continued detention of al-Qaeda prisoners at the military facility in Guantanamo Bay, Cuba, calling it a "logical" site that also provides inmates with "tropical breezes."
My god, the idiocy of this man is staggering.
This is the fucker that is the ranking Repug on the Armed Service Committee. Is he the best the GOP could come up with for that seat? How would you feel if you were a Repug senator and you lost out to this idiot?
What is it about meanness and stupidity that appeals to Republicans? Are they so afraid of empathy and logic that they have to deliberately be the opposite?
Come on GOP, die already. Maybe you will come back as the New Whigs.
Full sad and embarrassing story here:

Wednesday, May 13, 2009

Evil Labor Agenda

Ok. The title of this posting is misleading, as is the picture.
I am blogging from my cell phone during a fucking boring ass safety meeting and I am limited on time to formulate a witty title about my union meeting last night.
Also, I have no cool grahic on my phone so I just snapped a picture from a "Social Policy" magazine article with my cell.
As the saftey guy drones on and fucking on about why you should wear a hard hat or something, some of us are performing our "Twitter Prayer". Heads bowed with our hands in our laps, we give the appearance of penance. Pious and repentant we are obviously praying to the Lord to forgive us for our long coffee breaks and to bless our company and fellow employees to be productive and profitable.
Ha ha, fucking right.
Twitter Prayer. I think that is a good name for us nerds thumb typing away in our own little world.
Obviously, this is what I am doing. I have no idea what the fucktard across from me is texting. Maybe he is sexting. A term I heard on Bill Maher where people send naughty texts and pictures from their cell phones.
Anyway, at the union meeting last night we held nominations to send delegates to the international convention in Washington D.C. next month.
The rules have changed this year. It used to be the president of the local was an automatic delegate and the alternate delegate was picked by the local, pretty well however they wanted.
Now, we are required to have nominations followed by a blind vote. As expected, the membership nominated our president as the delegate and yours truely as the alternate. As there were no other nominations no vote was needed as we won by default.
As I said above, the convention this year is in D.C.
Last year it was in Las Vegas. :-) Not only was it in Vegas, the hotel we were at was the Star Trek Hilton. he he. This was just mere weeks before the geniuses at the Hilton decided they didn't want the Trek Experience there anymore even though the rebooting of the Star Trek franchise was happening. Fuck them. I hope I hear about the wrecking ball making it into a parking lot soon.
A guy in my local once asked me why did we have to go to the more exotic cities for our coventions and conferences. Poor fellow is pretty much a fucktard and has to be explained things very slowly.
Although I doubt he ever understood what the fuck I was saying, basically the CWA has a rule where they only use hotels where the workforce is organized. That pretty much leaves out a good portion of the country.
I do think that we should patronize union businesses whenever possible too. However, I think there is something to the idea of bringing a big international labor convention to a predominant non union city. Perhaps a place like Birmingham or Huntsville.
The exposure of these poor area bastards who are inundated non stop with pro fascist, anti labor propaganda may end up being a good thing.
When the cab driver or food server hears hundreds of people from the U.S. and Canada talking about the much better working conditions, maybe they will listen.
I love the thought of our asshole city council here in Huntsville trembling at the thought of having labor organizers in town, yet try to justify the millions of dollars the city would lose by not allowing them to come.
Anyway. I am gonna be in D.C. for a week next month. come see me.

Monday, May 11, 2009

The New Star Trek

Ok, so that picture is a classic stereotype of uncool and nerdiness, totally different than what the new movie conveys. Three middle age men sucking their beer bellies in as they get their picture took in their Trek uniforms is to the new movie what Adam West is to The Dark Knight.
But it is the only Trek pic I have on my phone at the moment.
The new Star Trek is a very successful and much needed reboot of the franchise.
J.J. Abrahms was able to write the reboot into the story itself. Most other franchise reboots start out where you pretend the other movies never existed. Not here.
I am not going to give anything away just say this is truely a Trek for everyone.
Old school trekkies will love the "red shirt death, Kirk/green woman, damn it Jim" and other classic moments from the original while new viewers will be caught up in the action and sexiness of it.
Star Trek is now offically cool, a black man is president, and the Republican Party is imploding like a planet being swallowed up by a singularity at its core. The future is here.
Oh yeah. And I was a trekkie before being a trekkie was cool.

Friday, May 8, 2009

Over Indulgence In Rocket City

Had a little to much fun during and after Star Trek last night.
Movie was fucking awesome! will try to write a spoiler free review later. Feel like a turd with the shit slapped out of it right now.

Wednesday, May 6, 2009

Dentist Trip Was a Bust

Dentist called in sick. Going back tomorrow at 1 pm. What a fucking bitch. Star Trek opens tomorrow night here in the Rocket City and if I make it, I probably won't be able to eat popcorn.
There is no god.

Tuesday, May 5, 2009

Tips for Curtailing Southern Jokes

This pic was sent to me by a friend who lives in Las Vegas, Nevada. Supposedly it was taken outside the Walmart in Gardendale, Alabama. I am sure there are any number of ladies in Las Vegas who look just like this (maybe not as inventive, but just as classy), but it seems that the jokes are always pointed at the South. I read the email, grimaced, and then hit delete. After a while, I began to realize that perhaps my irritation was misplaced, that this shit is really true. I retrieved the email from the trash bin so that I could share some tips. Folks, when you wear something like this out in public, expect to be photographed and paraded like the dumbass that you are. Here are a few simple suggestions so that we, who don’t act like dumbasses in the South, don’t have to be bombarded with the endless forwarded jokes:

1. Don’t take any article of clothing that was meant to cover a man’s ass and craft it into anything else, no good can come of it.

2. Don’t wear something that you wore to Joe’s Biker Bar last night to your Court hearing the next morning. (Connie, I'm talking to you)

3. Don’t drink and drive, and especially, don’t drink and drive while on a lawnmower, a motorboat or a horse.

4. Christmas lights do not belong on satellite dishes, chicken coops or on your pickup truck.

5. A size 6 dress, blouse, or pair of jeans will not fit a size 12 body, something will always hang out and be photographed.

I hope this helps.

Southern Republican Voters

Every Republican voter that I have ever talked to in the South justifies their vote in one of the following ways; the tax argument, the family values argument and the strong defense argument. Let’s take these one at a time:


See the table in the link below (married filing jointly) which outlines the Bush tax cuts which became effective January 1, 2003. See Wikipedia - Jobs and Growth Tax Relief Reconciliation Act of 2003 . Note that households earning up to $46,700.00 got no tax cut, (with the exception of those earning between $12,000 and $14,000, from 15 percent to 10 percent). The median household income in the State of Alabama for the years 2002 – 2004 was $38,111.00. See US Census Bureau . Taxpayers in the highest bracket (over $311,950.00 annually) got a 3.6 percent reduction. A quick calculation reveals that the minimum tax reduction for the highest bracket is $11,230.20 annually, while the majority of taxpayers in Alabama get nothing. Most people in the State don’t earn $300,000.00 annually and thus allowing the Bush tax cuts to expire, to them, is basically meaningless. Yet, almost every blue collar Republican in the State will say that Democrats are going to raise your taxes. (Yeah, if you earn over $300,000.00 a year). I just don’t understand the logic, but there is no point in arguing.

Family Values

Pro-life stance - Republicans have long held that abortion is wrong and that it should be illegal in most cases. To my way of thinking, the issue is not whether or not abortion is wrong, either legally or morally, it is who should be making that decision. (choice.) The issue involves moral and ethical considerations that should be left up to the individuals who are facing the issue. You cannot and we should not be legislating morals. I am not qualified to make a decision as to when life and thus rights begin, but apparently Republicans think they are. Republicans, in general, support the death penalty. Pro-life, as long as you are still in the womb, but woe be unto you if you have been born. Again, who among us is qualified to make the decision about whether someone lives or dies? I am not qualified to make that decision, but apparently Republicans think they are.

Same Sex Marriage – I posed a question to a friend of mine once when she said that homosexuality was wrong and that homosexuals should either change or become celibate. “Think about your sexuality as you are now, then put yourself into a society where homosexuality is the norm, would you be able to change yourself to conform with the norms of that society?” What threat do same sex marriages pose to the American family?

It just seems to me that conservatives take stands on some issues that conflict with stands they take on others. We don’t want you to have an abortion, but we don’t want you to have access to condoms or any information about family planning. We don’t want you to have an abortion, or family planning, but we also don’t want you to be on the welfare rolls. We don’t want you to have an abortion, we don’t want you to have condoms, we don’t want you on the welfare rolls, but we also don’t want to subsidize child care so you can work.

Their ideas on the family are not realistic.

Strong Defense

In the last 8 years, we’ve invaded a country that posed no threat to us. We’ve captured foreign nationals, held them for years on end without charging them with anything. We’ve used “aggressive interrogation” on individuals to attempt to gain information, including waterboarding, beatings, intimidation, humiliation, sleep deprivation, temperature extremes, stress positions. All of this leaves a bad taste in my mouth and has harmed the reputation of the United States abroad. Admittedly, I don’t have all the facts and if someone shows me proof that these things were necessary, then I’ll concede the point, but for now I can’t imagine that any of this makes us safer.

The bottom line is that the Republican machine has done a good job in the South of herding the sheep. Just pour on the piety, make vague statements about taxes and defending the red, white and blue and you’ve got ‘em, hook, line and sinker.

Monday, May 4, 2009

Rolling on the Floor, Laughing My Fucking Ass Off!

Trekkies Bash New Star Trek Film As 'Fun, Watchable'

Fuck You Jeff Sessions

Goddam half a motherfucking midget.
Sessions' dismal record on race -- including a black former assistant U.S. attorney's testimony that Sessions once said he "used to think they [the Klan] were OK" until he found out some of them were "pot smokers" -- was chronicled in a 2002 article in The New Republic.

Party of NO!

Read a tweet awhile ago stating that leaders of the G.O.P. are defending off shore tax havens in response to the current administrations plan to close that shitty tax loophole.
While I didn't follow the link posted with the tweet and confirm it, this is indeed the type of desperation the Repugs have sunk to.
It appears that they plan on opposing every fucking thing Obama does regardless of what is right for the country or what Americans want.
While I have seen many fucktards making fools of themselves, I have never seen it done on such a massive scale. Even the great Cockhunt of 98 wasn't as bad as this.
One can almost forgive the fucktards then as their obsession with Bill Clintons cock drove them insane. Add that to a roaring economy and peace, what else could a fucktard do?
But now we are in an economic crisis and trying to deal with two wars and the Repugs want to pull this shit?
I guess we should continue to point and laugh at them as much as possible. It will piss them off more. And the more pissed they are the more irrational they become.
Lets do our American duty and help the fucktards in their slide into irrelevancy.
Oh, and don't feel bad about kicking them while they are down. After all, when is a better time to kick someone?

Update. Here is the link to the above mentioned article.

Sunday, May 3, 2009

A clear concience?

Cheney02 Pictures, Images and Photos

Google Maps Pissing Off People

I really don't know which way I stand on this issue. I can see it from both sides. Although I guess I lean more to the defense of Google. Honestly I only sped read the article so I may be missing the whole fucking point.
But historical information should be shared. History belongs to all of us. I think we all agree on that.
The maps date back to the country's feudal era, when shoguns ruled and a strict caste system was in place. At the bottom of the hierarchy were a class called the "burakumin," ethnically identical to other Japanese but forced to live in isolation because they did jobs associated with death, such as working with leather, butchering animals and digging graves.

Click for full story


If you don't smile when you watch this, you are a fucking robot. Go back to making cars and plotting the enslavement of mankind.