Monday, October 25, 2010

36 Things You'll Never Hear a Teabagger Say

1. "I'll take Shakespeare for 1000, Alex"
2. "Duct tape won't fix that."
3. "Come to think of it, I'll have a Heineken."
4. "We don't keep firearms in this house."
5. "You can't feed that to the dog."
6. "I thought Graceland was tacky."
7. "No kids in the back of the's not safe."
8. "Professional wresslin's fake."
9. "Honey, did you mail that donation to Greenpeace?"
10. "We're vegetarians."
11. "Do you think my hair is too big?"
12. "I'll have grapefruit instead of biscuits and gravy."
13. "Honey, these bonsai trees need watering."
14. "I don't understand the appeal of NASCAR."
15. "Give me the small bag of pork rinds."
16. "Deer heads detract from the decor."
17. "Spitting is such a nasty habit."
18. "I just couldn't find a thing at Wal-Mart today."
19. "Trim the fat off that steak."
20. "Cappuccino tastes better than espresso."
21. "The tires on that truck are too big."
22. "I'll have the arugula and radicchio salad."
23. "I've got it all on a USB stick."
24. "Unsweetened tea tastes better."
25. "Would you like your fish poached or broiled?"
26. "My fiancée is registered at Tiffany's."
27. "I've got two cases of Zima for the Super Bowl."
28. "She's too old to be wearing that bikini."
29. "Does the salad bar have bean sprouts?"
30. "Hey, here's an episode of Hee Haw that we haven't seen."
31. "I don't have a favorite college football team."
32. "Be sure to bring my salad dressing on the side."
33. "I believe you cooked those green beans too long."
34. "Those shorts ought to be a little longer, Darla."
35. "Elvis who?"
36. "Checkmate"


  1. This was another test of my iPhone app. Just trying to work bugs out.
    Can't seem to get the format and the pic posting right.
    It is great for uploading and saving to a draft and posting later however.
    You would think that the iPhone would be better, but my other T-Mobile Dash did it much easier and quicker.
    As with the other Teabagger list, I didn't write it or know who did. It was just another Redneck joke that I swapped the names around on and added some pics.

  2. "I would have signed the bills to help my fellow Americans during this crisis." Something a tea party person would never say while they draw unemployment checks,social security and go to the VA hospital.